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There may have been only one or two commenters that guessed this, but it turns out my boss wasn’t upset. He said he shouldn’t have been talking about his daughter like that at work and he didn’t realize how his comment about me sounded until I reacted like that. I wrote back to this letter-writer and said, “Thank you for this update, and for your good grace about the comments!Then I apologized and told him that I was completely in the wrong to insinuate that about his daughter. He said he understood where that comment came from and that (remarkably) he didn’t take it personally. Thankfully, no other coworkers were within earshot (this happened in a conference room while waiting for some other coworkers to join us), and I don’t work with clients or customers anyway. I thought the word was normal and commonly used, because that’s how it was at home (the exact quote I blurted out was screamed at me countless times at home and I was called a whore several times a day by my teachers). To all of those saying my behavior is not Christian or that I am not a “true Christian”: I am well aware that Jesus was a friend of prostitutes, but Jesus is not all there is to Christianity. Also, I just wanted to say, I did not feel attacked at all by the comments. It appears some commenters think criticism of Christianity is an “attack” or “bashing,” but this is not so. I’m sorry you had that word screamed at you ever, let alone so frequently — that’s horrible and must have been a very difficult way to grow up.” She replied: “It was a difficult way to grow up *at the time*, but it kept me in line, and thus led me to become a better adult. (But we’ll probably disagree on that.)” While I do indeed disagree, I am deeply impressed with letter-writers who handle disagreement from a mob of strangers with this much grace.

My boss has been acting weird/standoffish towards me since I made this comment, and understandably so. This is problematic on multiple levels, including that you shouldn’t be calling teenage girls “whores” for expressing a perfectly age-appropriate, culture-appropriate interest in dating.Because there’s been some question about this below, I want to clarify it here: I do not think bigotry is gracious. I am a female employee in my late 20s working for a large Fortune 500 U. One day a couple weeks ago, my boss was talking as usual about how his daughter is very attractive and wants to start dating.To this day, I hear the word used at least weekly outside of work. I still think dating is immoral, but there is no need to use such harsh language. Criticism of beliefs is alright, and in this case it was much needed. A while after this post published, I removed a line from the letter-writer’s update about “sexual deviancy” that seems to refer to LGBTQ people and others.You may see reference to it in the comment section so I wanted to provide that context.

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